Which Part of You is Tired?

I recently took my car into the shop.

It was making weird noises when I made turns. A clunky shaking and groaning that reminded me of being on the old roller coaster at Playland where part of the excitement was wondering how mechanically sound it was.

What was supposed to be a small fix turned into a two week job where the problem was MUCH bigger than anyone had anticipated.

I hadn’t been bringing it for regular maintenance. I took it for granted. I forgot that it needed care from time to time, too.

Anyway, lesson learnt here was if you don’t take the time to maintain the health of something, you’re signing up for a big, fat, inevitable emergency bill that will hurt a lot more in the long run.

Much like our own bodies.

So when was the last time you did a check-in with your body?

When was the last time you felt good? Let yourself feel something good? Allowed yourself to look for something good?

There’s almost this fear that if we stop to feel good, congratulate ourselves or just celebrate and enjoy for a while, the drive and motivation that got us where we are will diminish.

A pattern that I’ve been more mindful of lately is to not just constantly be chasing the next goal. To let myself slow down sometimes and just be where I’m at, slowing down to a leisurely stroll, or even a full stop to look around and enjoy the scenery.

And in moments where I am tired, feeling rundown, or depleted, to do one small act that feels good for the heart. The other day that small act for me was listening to old Chinese ballads from 80’s and 90’s era Hong Kong while on my walk, songs I’d hear in the background all the time when I was growing up. I think it’s soothing because it transports me back to a version of me that was melancholy and tender-hearted, someone that yearned to have and be everything that I am now; it helps form a connection to a part of me that isn’t lost, when I take the time to remember. And it helps me recalibrate just how far I’ve come, all I’ve created thus far.

I think for a lot of us on a personal growth or healing journey we can tend to fixate on what’s still not healed.

Healing is work. Growth is work.

And just like we can’t work 7 days a week and not expect ourselves to crash, we can’t heal all the time and not expect ourselves to want to give up, because it gets too painful.

In the midst of healing and growing it’s important to give ourselves breaks, to go do something that’s pleasurable, to relax and do nothing, to give ourselves time to rest from all the hard work and let our bodies get used to all the change. To say this is good, now. Look at what I’ve done, now. This is enough, right now.

This is how we make anything sustainable.

Action is required in order to move forward, and sometimes inaction is okay too. To take a moment to savour the view of the heights we’ve climbed so far, without a need to rush to the top. There is no finish line in the journey we call growth. The journey we call love. The journey back to ourselves. Because it takes constant, consistent effort, it also requires constant, consistent rest.

Which part of you is tired? Let that be a signal to you to decide which part of you needs rest. Which part of you needs to stop for a while. Stopping doesn’t mean quitting. Stopping doesn’t mean giving up. Stopping just means letting the engines cool, allowing a bit of maintenance, and then getting up again, when YOU feel ready.

As I learned last week, care needs to be a consistent effort. This is how we create long-term, lasting energy for ourselves. How we learn to not try harder, but softer. A slow drip of kindness towards ourselves so that a full breakdown becomes something not only avoidable, but unnecessary in order for us to give ourselves permission to pause, reflect and rest.

Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be gentle with the beautiful, soft, wondrous being that you are. Bask in your own light, your own radiance, regularly. The energy that dwells within you, that emanates from you, and that exists all around you is sacred and unique to you. Be generous with yourself. Never doubt for a moment that you are worth every ounce of consideration, patience, and thoughtful attention that you dole out so generously to others. You are the most amazing thing about you. All you have to do is remember.